I smell like moldy fruit.

Today I did something I swore I would never.

Today. I spray tanned.

Other than stinking to high holiness, it was easy and quick. I had no idea of what to expect. I asked a thousand and one questions before committing to the tan. The poor girl didn't know what hit her. Here she thought she had an easy job that would pay the bills, buy lots of lip gloss, and she could leather her skin for free, then I walked in.

So, I asked my questions, payed my bill, got in there and did the deed.

Then, 7 hours later, I showered. It all came off. Well, except for my stained hands.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... *angry eyes*

I got online to research spray tans to see if this is "normal". Turns out, yes, most of the tan will wash off. However, the DHA, is supposed to have already absorbed into my skin and in 24 hours my tan will achieve the optimal peak. Oh my, I'm blushing ;^)

Still, I'm a little irked that I didn't stay as bronzed and dewy as I looked an hour ago (pre-shower). Also, it only lasts for 4 to 7 days, and then I have to go back for a touch up! That's a mighty expensive fake tan!!!

I think from now on I'll stick to the beds.

I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship. ~Louisa May Alcott

Maybe I'm feeling introspective because it's so late.

I really don't know.

I know this, I'm typing with my eyes closed because it feels beautiful. Letting my fingers run over the keys, knowing which ones I'm touching without looking...it feels so right.
I guess that's a lot like a good marriage.

I know my husband.

I know how NOT to look at him if I'm just not in "the mood", because that look will surely get me into trouble. I know that he likes his head rubbed because he wears a hat all day and it's just not the same when you have to rake your fingers through your own hair. I know when we fight, that he's in bed thinking how sorry he is and I'm out here typing away in a frenzy. He's really wishing he could say something, but he's too scared to. Of course, he knows, I'll still make him sweat it out 'till the morning when he can crawl over to me and wait for me to look at him with approval. I know he thinks I'm beautiful, even though I don't. He loves my curves, when I hate them so much. He thinks my goofy faces are funny and cute, not scary. He thinks every man is looking at me and every woman wishes she could be me.

I hope in 10, 20, 30 years, I know a whole new set of things about him. I hope we still have secret dialog. I hope we're still comfortable with silence, sometimes, for an entire day. I hope his tummy still dances when I walk in the room, as he claims it does now.

Mostly, I hope my girls look at us and see. I hope they see two people that really like each other. I hope they see that you can fight, and you can make up. You can be angry, and happy, and sad, and a little boring, and still have a very healthy marriage.

I hope they marry someone just like their Daddy, because nobody else will be good enough.

I love to twirl

AND, I love this dress. It makes me feel all womanly and pretty.

It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not- Unknown

I realized last night that I hold myself back.

I follow a lot of blogs, they're full of women bursting with self confidence. I love looking at their pictures, I wish I could be them, look like them, dress like them. Last night I was browsing pictures and discovered something. None of these women are great beauties, please don't mistake me-they are BEAUTIFUL women-, but more than having good looks and lithe figures, they're very sure of themselves.

I looked through some of my own pictures, the ones I could find. I'm never caught on camera without something/someone in front of me and in full makeup. My eyes look like they're trying to be happy, trying to make someone believe I'm ok. I shouldn't try to make people believe something about me, I should be the person I want to be!

So, today I'm turning over a new leaf. I'm posting a picture WITHOUT makeup on and I'm mighty proud of it.

ME

What a day...

Yesterday my son woke up with a fever of 102, he wouldn't eat and was really lethargic. We took him to Cook Children's Hospital and they diagnosed him with pneumonia, ulcers in his throat, IBS, and a virus. We finally got him to drink 2 oz of pedialite last night (with his medicine) and he slept great. This morning his fever was down to 100.5 and he had 5 oz of pedialite with his meds. He's asleep again and I'm resting. Whew! What a horrible day it was. I hate it when I feel helpless, there's nothing worse than not being able to make your child well.

Today, I'm just trying to focus on staying OP and cleaning the house. I've done really great this week, I'm hoping to lose 1 or 2 lbs. I lost so much last week (6 lbs) that I'm not sure if I'll lose much, if any, this week.

Hope your day is better than mine was yesterday!

My husband can cook!

I'm so lucky to have the man I do! He's an amazing cook, and very cute ;^) He made us homemade taquitos today! Yum!!!!

http://dresseduplikealady.blogspot.com/

Visit this Blog ASAP, follow it, it's incredible. Her style is timeless and daring. I want this dress, BTW.

Pep in my step!

I got my hair cut last night! Whenever I get it chopped off I feel like dancing. However, I've never had such a daring (and amazing) cut that I dance in my stylist's chair, which is precisely what I did! So much fun! I love this hair!!!!!!!

When I was fatter I would have never done this, it draws too much attention to my face! Now, I'm just feeling so good about myself, I don't care who looks at me!

Have an amazing day everyone, and WW friends, stay OP!!!!!

They fit!!!

Ok, so, very poor quality (phone) picture. However, notice not the measly amount of megapixel, but the pants! Yes, these are two years old!!! I bought them and only fit them for about 2 months (got fat after that). They've been in my closet since then and now they're on me!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Morning bowl of fashion!

First off, LBD:

Not daring, but timeless. I love dresses that can stay with you for years. This is slimming and GORGEOUS, I want one.











Second:

Love the risk K.P.'s taking with this dress, and I love how CONFIDENT she is in her choice! Head held high and hands on her hips. It's like she's saying, "I dare you to find something wrong with me, because I KNOW I'm gorgeous!".

Lost weight this week!

I'm on WW and lately have really been applying myself. I would like to do a few things come summer, and I cannot be overweight if I want to do well.

Well, I started at 255lbs and today weighed in at 219!!! My goal is 170 (I'm 5'10") and I feel like I can practically touch it!!!!

So, I had a 6 lbs loss this week. BTW, that's very abnormal, a healthy rate of weight loss is .5-2lbs lost per week. I've been averaging 1.2 lost per week, but I guess this week I got "lucky"!!!

Yay! I'm going to be skinny again! Hmmmm...I need to post an updated pic of myself!

New photos of a style icon

I have always LOVED Marilyn Monroe's style. So effortless and sexy. She was fully comfortable with being a woman. I think this outfit would be gorgeous on so many different bodies. Beautiful, timeless, style.

I heart this dress.

What a beautiful design! Oh, the 50's, full of stereotypes and amazing clothes.

If I could wear this little number every day I would.

Anybody have $250 laying about!?

*1950's "Matthew Richards" Original Miami-Designer Label
*Vibrant Yellow-Roses Watercolor Cotton-Print
*Seductive Embellished-Appliques Fitted Halter Bodice
*Cocktail-Length Bombshell Summertime Circle-Skirt

NSV

Stands for Non Scale Victory.

Those of you who are WW know that many times, these little victories are more important than losing weight! It means we're changing, growing, and accepting ourselves.

In this case, it means I fit into some pants that I haven't been able to wear since May of 2007! Hmmmm...yes, a tad out of style, and I had to mend a hole so that you couldn't see my undies,but they fit! They're even a little lose!

Yay!!!!!

"Earl Grey, HOT!"

I'm a big Star Treck NG fan. Only people who have watched that show would understand the title of this post.

Picard would order his favorite tea, Earl Grey, from the simulator with that line. Sometimes I wish I had a simulator.

"Easy life, now!" or, "Money, quick!" or how about this one, "-75 lbs, stat!".

Unfortunately life isn't that easy. Maybe I should say fortunately, life isn't that easy. I can't imagine what this world would be like if nobody had to try and work hard for what they wanted. Oh wait, Obama's making that possible right now...so maybe my next request of the simulator would be, "GET ME OUTA HERE, NOW!".

Sassy

May I say right now, sassy is my new favorite word.

It's the perfect description for so many things.

"My, your dog is sassy" -this could be used if the dog is barking at you, gettin' "busy" with another doggie, or dressed in a cute sweater vest-

"This food is sassy!" -picture this, you're at an ethnic restaurant, you order something in a different language, and it's punches you in the throat with intenseness-

"That dress is sassy!!!" -my favorite way to use it, if someone is wearing particularly amazing threads and you just MUST comment on them-

Anyway you use it, it's a wonderful word and I'm going to say it more.

Better go now, my sassy daughters are on my last nerve.

Growing

I think I'm discovering more of myself through raising my third child.

I remember when my first daughter was born. I was so eager for her to do everything first. Quick! I was so proud that she got her first tooth at 1 month, I had her eating baby cereal by three months, I was pretty upset when she didn't sit up/stand/walk before her cousin (who's 1 day older). I can't believe how obsessed I was.

When baby #2 came along I was a lot more laid back, but she did everything much sooner than #1 and I remember feeling a little sad that she wasn't "little" for long. I was thrilled that she waited to get teeth 'till 6 months, giving her that baby look for a short while longer. I truly did cherish my time with her. However, having a second child doesn't mean you're an expert and comfortable with the game, I still lost my temper with both the girls and had moments that I wish I could do over.

Now I have #3. It's so different. I just can't describe the feeling to a first time mom, she wouldn't understand it. Every time he moves a little more I want to cry, he's growing up. Every time I watch his eyes discover something new all I can think is, there goes a little bit more of his baby mind, forming into an intelligent being. I'm not eager for him to reach milestones. I still hold his bottle (he's 7 months old) when I feed him, I'm never going to get to do that again...so why push him to do it now? I am thrilled the teething is coming along so well, but I wish so badly to see those untouched gums smiling at mommy again. Every time he lays his head on my chest I think, this is one less time he'll do this.

Having a boy is so much different than a girl. Girls will hold your hand when they're a teenager, they'll still kiss you on the lips when you drop them off for college, you're still going to be "Momma, Mommy, Mum". A boy grows into a man and you HAVE to let him go or you'll make him into one of "those" guys that can't have a normal relationship with his wife because he's unusually attached to his mother. I thank the Lord every day for my mother in law. She managed to mold my husband into a caring and respectful adult/husband/father and he still loves her so very much.

Sometimes when I'm looking at Jeff and Jeffrey together I think about Margie (MIL) and what she must have felt, watching her little man grow up. Thank you so much Margie, for letting him grow.

As I watch my little guy sleep I'm taking in every breath, every whimper, every smell, because soon it will be gone, and I want to remember it for all it was. Pure and perfect.

New mom's, don't be eager for you kids to get bigger. Don't constantly think about what milestone she/he'll hit next. It's not important when they'll start chewing solid foods or standing without holding onto your fingers. One day they won't need your fingers for balance, and they'll enter a world that you're not apart of. All you'll have left are the memories of when they were small...and you were their world.

30 LBS GONE!

This morning I started my day the way I wish every day could start.

I lost 4 more lbs :^)

30 LBS GONE people!!!! Boy, for the first time I am just so proud of ME. I'm a very flighty person and tend to straddle the fence when it comes to things that take a lot of time and energy. This is the first time in years that I can say my hard work has paid off.

That song that introduces The Biggest Loser, "What have you done today, to make you feel proud?". Well, I've taken control of my life, now what have YOU done!?

Memorial Day

We had our BBQ on Saturday and it was so much fun!

I knew we were in for a shocker, having never been to a "real" Texas BBQ. The food they made was AMAZING and I didn't over do it! I brought veggie trays, fruit trays, and a bag of grapes. Also, I was in charge of dessert. I brought Strawberry Shortcake (FF Cool Whip). An awesome 4 point dessert that left everyone satisfied!

We went to church yesterday (almost stayed in bed...probably should have) and then relaxed for the rest of the day. We had an amazing rain storm here, just poured in sheets and sheets...so beautiful. I never cease to marvel at the beauty God creates for our pleasure every day. Since canceling our cable *whimper* I've had many peaceful days just looking out the windows (when I'm not chasing all three of the kids around).

I do miss my California so much these days. Just thinking about what I would be doing if I was back home...
Walking through the trees in Paradise, CA and later on dipping our feet in the lake. There's nothing like a small town to make your heart feel full and happy.

Have a beautiful day celebrating everything that makes our country amazing and FREE.

A day in the life of a Weight Watcher.

Day 1 (right after weigh in)
Oh boy, that piece of cake I saved is near,
One big slice, I have no fear.
Besides, no pounds will ever show,
I've got seven whole days to go.

Day 2
A day of shopping at the mall,
And a burger special – cheese, mayo and all.
I'll walk it off and get in gear.
Six days to go, no weigh-in near!

Day 3
I think I'll skip my tuna lunch.
A Reuben Sandwich is what I'll munch.
With maybe a shake and chips, you know?
Besides, I've got five days to go!

Day 4
For breakfast one egg, toast and juice.
Kids left their pancakes.
Oh! What's the use?
These days wasting food is such a sin,
And it's still four days till I weigh in.

Day 5
Boy, the weekend is really rough.
Restaurant menus are very tough!
I'll work off this steak, no problem here.
In just three days I'll be in the clear?

Day 6
Breakfast... I'll just have coffee today.
Maybe I'll lose some that way!
Supper... I'm starving – I could eat a whale.
Two more days till I step on that scale!

Day 7
Now my nerves are really a wreck.
I might as well eat.
Oh! What the heck!
I'll drink tons of water and walk all night.
One day to go – I'll be alright.

Weigh in day
I polished off the pizza as a snack today.
But followed it with two bowls of Special K!
I gained two pounds – can you believe?
Maybe it's the Milky Way I've got up my sleeve.
Really, Weight Watchers works if you just take it slow.
I guess I didn't have seven days to go!